When you buy a gift you don’t keep it for yourself. The purpose of purchasing a gift is to give it away to someone who will like it and appreciate it. So, when a loved one has a birthday or when Christmas or some other gift-giving holiday comes around we know exactly what to do. We go into store after store looking for the perfect gift to give to that perfect person. You know that loved one’s likes and dislikes and because of this you know exactly what he or she will want to receive on this special-gift giving day. And you know that when the day comes for you to give that gift away that the happiness etched across your loved one’s face will let you know that that gift that you bought was a perfect gift for that person.

Now, you did spend all of that time picking out the perfect gift, so if you wanted to keep the gift (I mean, you did buy it after all) you could. You could keep it, but you don’t. And the reason why you don’t keep your gift is because you know that you’re supposed to share it with that special person. It wouldn’t make sense for you to put in all of that effort in to finding a perfect gift for your loved one only to keep it for yourself, so you share your perfect gift instead.

The perfect gift.

That’s what we all search for at one point in time or another. We want to find our gift. But unlike with gift giving, we are trying to find the perfect gift for ourselves. We don’t want to go around life without having a gift, so we search and we search and we search until we find that thing that drives us…our gift…our passion. We fight until we find that reason for living that will actually make us happy to wake up in the morning and start on our days. Finding our gifts and talents and using them is what helps us to live a fulfilling life, but discovering those gifts isn’t necessarily easy for everyone. Some people know all of their lives what they are truly talented at, but for others, this journey comes as a bit of a struggle. If you have discovered your gifts positive thinker, then make sure to hold on to them and use them as you go on throughout your life, but if you haven’t figured out what your gift is then don’t give up just yet. If you’re having problems discovering what your gift is then try this on for size…

A friend once told me to not give up on finding my passion in life, and she was right. I told this friend that I wasn’t feeling very fulfilled with where my life was and she told me that it didn’t make sense to walk around this world feeling unfilled, so she gave me some advice that helped her to find her passion, and I encourage you to use it too if you’re having trouble finding yours. In order to find out her passion, she first set aside some time to really examine herself. And once she set aside some time, she used that time to compile a list. The list that she made had all of the things that she did in her life that genuinely made her feel good and happy about herself. And when she made this list, she didn’t leave off anything. No item was too small. So when you make your list positive thinker, make sure not to leave anything out either. If you feel good when you’re washing the dishes then write that down, and when you write it down try and think about what exactly it is about that thing on your list that makes you feel happy in the moment that you’re experiencing it. Is it getting to work with water? Is it the fact that you get to take something dirty and grimy and make it new again? Or perhaps it may be the fact that your mind gets to wander unchecked and free during this time, and that’s when you just so happen to be at your best. It doesn’t matter what the reason is, just write it down. Taking some time to hone in on what you truly like will help you to find your gift (or gifts). And as time passes and your list finally becomes complete, you’ll end up discovering what it is that will really make you feel fulfilled because ten times out of ten the things that you’re gifted at are the things that make you the happiest while you’re experiencing them. The information that you need to find your gift is inside of you, but bringing it out of you and writing it down allows it to all be right there in front of you at the same time instead of in individual pieces and snippets in your mind. You have a gift inside of you positive thinker, all of us do, but you just have to dig deep enough to find it.

And once you find your gift, you shouldn’t keep it to yourselves because, after all, it is a gift and gifts are meant to be shared. Once we find out what our gifts are, then it’s our job to make sure that we share it with others. Do you remember how your friend’s eyes lit up when you gave him or her the perfect birthday present? Well if you could pass on that same light in your loved one’s eyes to the people you encounter simply by sharing your gift, wouldn’t you want to do that? You could have the chance to spread a bit of happiness just by doing something that you love doing and that you were born to do. All you have to do is share it.

When you’re lucky enough to discover what your gifts are make sure to embrace them because our gifts were given to us so that they could be embraced and used. But also remember, you don’t get a gift for someone just so that you can keep it to yourself. You buy it so that you can share it. So, don’t keep your gifts to yourself positive thinker. They’re met to be shared.

And remember, “The meaning of life is to find your gift. The purpose of life is to give it away.”

devil women

Take a look at the picture above. What do you see? Did you see an image of a devil’s face? Or perhaps you might have seen an image of a group of women hanging out in a room together. Both of these images are in the picture above, but depending on how you looked at the picture, you either saw the devil’s face or the group of women.

Isn’t it funny how you can look at one picture and see two completely different images? How you perceived these images resulted in whether you saw one image over the other. Perception is important, but it isn’t just important in determining whether you saw a devil or women; it just so happens to be an essential and constant part of our lives. It plays a major role in how we navigate through our lives on a daily basis. We are constantly taking in information. The auditory, visual, tactile, olfactory, and gustatory cues that surround us from day to day help to shape what we think about and how we behave in this world.

Daily we are confronted with an array of experiences. We have to interact and deal with other people, and we have to deal with unforeseen circumstances. Life is unpredictable and sometimes we run into unfavorable situations, but that doesn’t mean that we have to walk around only seeing the bad things about these less than desirable conditions. Like I’ve said before, there is good in every situation, you just have to find it. You loosing your job just means that you have a chance to find something even bigger and better than where you were at before. You breaking up with your significant other just means that you don’t have to waste anymore time in a relationship that wasn’t right for you. And you falling on hard times financially just means that you’ll have more time to appreciate the simpler things in life, which is something that we should do more but often times fail to do.

And even if you can’t find the good in your bad situation, chances are that if you take a few minutes to really assess the situation you’ll end up discovering that that situation is not as terrible as you’re making it out to be because things really are never as bad as they seem. Some of the curve balls life throws our way really are difficult to deal with and finding the good in that situation may be more difficult than finding the good in just a minor snag or hiccup. The real goal in these instances should be for you to try and find a way to look at the situation with a little less horror than you did when you first came across it. And if you have difficulty seeing the situation for what it really is, talking to an objective someone who is outside of the situation may just help you to get some extra perspective so that you can see the reality of your problem. Or your solution to seeing things more clearly may be as simple as allowing for some time to pass before deciding to take a look at the situation again. Trying not to see the bad when it seems like there’s nothing but around you is a difficult thing to do, but it’s a completely possible task for you to achieve once you are able to take a new perspective.

Now before we finish up here, let’s go back to the image at the top of this post one more time. When you first saw it you didn’t make the decision to see one version of the picture over the other. Your mind chose it for you. But once you found out that there was more than one image, you could then choose which image you wanted to focus your attention on. If you wanted to see the devil you could change the way you perceived the picture and see the devil. And on the other hand, if you wanted to see the women then you could change your perception to see the women instead of the devil.

This process doesn’t only just work for the image above positive thinker; you can use it when you have to take on those unexpected curve balls. Unlike with the picture, you start out knowing that there is more than one way for you to look at an undesirable situation. You can either take the time to find the good in the not so good situation, or you can choose to focus only on the bad and not see the good. And because you already know the two ways that you can perceive bad situations, you also have the option to choose whatever perception you want to use. You may have started out seeing the bad, but because you know the good option exists, you have the capability to switch over to that better way of looking at your problem.

Positive thinker you don’t want to walk around seeing the devil when you know a happier image exists, so don’t choose it. Choose the happier version!

And always remember, “A good day begins and ends with perception.”

During your childhood and teenage years you probably thought about doing (or maybe even did) something just because someone else (who was more popular than you) told you that it was the cool thing to do. Now I’m not talking about something small like someone telling you to try a new kind of food even though it didn’t look appetizing to you. No, what I’m talking about is something that goes a lot deeper… something that if you agreed to do it would go against a belief or moral that stretched all the way down to the very core of who you are. You may not have wanted to do this thing, but because somebody that you wanted to be friends with told you that they would like you better if you did that thing that you really did not want to do you ended up succumbing to the peer pressure. You wanted to be liked (most kids do) so instead of sticking to your morals you caved in and engaged in this undesirable activity in order to gain a new “friend.”

Now, I use “friend” in quotes because this person that convinced you to participate in that activity that you really didn’t want to participate in wasn’t really your friend. Now that you’re older you realize that a real friend would have never pushed you to do something that you really and truly didn’t want to do. A friend would have accepted your answer when you told them that you didn’t want to participate in that activity and they wouldn’t’ve pushed you to do that thing that went against who you are a person simply because they valued who you were as a person and respected your beliefs.

We know that now we shouldn’t have these kinds of “friends” in our life. We know that we should only keep people in our lives that value who we are. We know this. But yet, sometimes we find ourselves surrounded by people who don’t value our worth. This world is tough and scary, and most of us don’t want to navigate through it by ourselves. Having somebody (or somebodies) there by your side to walk with you through this life makes living in this world a little less scary and a little bit more manageable.

Now and again we think that having friends in high places will make us happier, so we revert back to our childhood and teenage selves. You still want to be liked by those people with power because you think that they can help you steer through this world more clearly, so you may sometimes feel the need to change something about yourself so that you can be like these people and be liked by these people. And allow me to clarify some more. When I say people in high places, I don’t necessarily mean that you’re literally trying to befriend CEO’s and CFO’s of fortune 500 companies. What I’m saying is that I do know that there will be people that you come across who have something that you “want,” and you may be tempted to listen to what they have to say and to change yourself accordingly even though what they’re telling you to do is in stark contrast with who you are as a person. You may think that these “friends” have your best interest at heart, but anyone who is trying to change who you are at your core does not have your best interest in mind at all.

You see positive thinker, the thing about friendship is that you shouldn’t have to be around people who don’t want to be around an authentic version of yourself. If they can’t see your value then you shouldn’t want to have them as a part of your life. Nobody should make you feel like you have to change yourself in order to be liked. If you feel like you need to change who you are to keep around certain people then you can better believe that those people aren’t worth having around. You are an amazingly unique human being positive thinker. Your worth is not defined by some other person, it’s defined by you. So be happy being you because when you are confident with who you are you will start to attract people who also like you for who you are.

Wouldn’t you rather have somebody by your side who wanted you to be the best you that you can be? You should have people in your life trying to make you a better version of yourself that is still in line with who you are as person. You don’t need people who are trying to transform you into a completely different version of yourself that is void of all of what makes you you in the first place. But, if you do succumb to what these people are trying to make you in to be, you will end up feeling the effects of it, and it won’t be in a good way either. Being unauthentic takes a toll on your body mentally, physically, spiritually, and emotionally because when you’re unauthentic you put all of your time and energy into being someone that you weren’t meant to be and that’s difficult. But, when you have people in your life who encourage you to be you then you can truly be free because you don’t have to work hard to be you. It’s effortless and natural, and you don’t have to pretend to be something other than what you were meant to be.

Positive thinker you know that you should surround yourself with people who appreciate your worth, but sometimes we are blinded by what we think we need, and we end up forgetting temporarily that people who want us to be fake versions of ourselves will not end up doing us any good in the long run. So if you’ve happened to forget that you don’t need these kinds of people in your life then here is your reminder…

Get rid of the people in your life who don’t appreciate you for who you are positive thinker. You have worth, and everyone in your life should be able to recognize and value it.

So always remember, “When you know your value, you don’t have to beg people to like you, to be your mate, to spend time with you or to love you. Be confident in who you are.”

How many times do you go on Facebook in a day? 5? 10? 15 times? And how often do you find yourself looking at your friend’s photos on Instagram everyday? Sites like Instagram, Facebook, and Twitter seem to take up a significant portion of many of our lives. With each and every passing day all the different forms of social media become more and more popular, and as a result of this, more and more people flock to these forms of online connectedness to share what’s going on in their lives and to look at what’s going on in the lives of others.

When you get in a new relationship, you run to Facebook so that you can make it “Facebook official.”

When you buy a new car, you take a picture in front of it and post it on Instagram for all of your friends to see.

When you get a new promotion at work you turn to Twitter and compose a 140 character perfectly crafted tweet that lets everyone know how excited you are about your new promotion.




We want to be viewed as having our lives together, so when we achieve something that’s “worthy” of sharing we share it.

Unfortunately, for those of us who don’t have our lives where we want them to be at, this constant influx of people succeeding with what they want from life can become discouraging. Seeing people getting what they want can be upsetting especially when you seem to be working just as hard, but can’t seem to get ahead. We look at their lives and see how well they’re doing and we start to feel like there’s something wrong with us for not having what they have. And when you start to compare yourself to someone who seems to be doing better than you you often times tend to feel worse about yourself.

When you see someone is better off than you you may want to compare yourself to them, but don’t fall into that trap positive thinker. You’re not the same person as the person that you’re comparing yourself to, so you shouldn’t compare yourself to that person. I’m sure you’ve heard the saying “you can’t compare apples and oranges,” and if you haven’t, this expression is basically saying that you can’t compare two things to each other that are completely different. Yes apples and oranges are both fruit, but that’s where their similarities start and end. And yes you and the person that you are comparing yourself to are both human, but that is where your sameness starts and ends. You are a completely unique individual who is on a completely unique journey, so it doesn’t make sense to compare yourself to somebody else because that person that you’re comparing yourself to is a completely unique person who is on an entirely different journey than you are on. And just because they seem to be ahead right now, doesn’t mean that you can’t or won’t be ahead at some other part of your journey. You can’t be that person that you’re comparing yourself to because you aren’t that person that you’re comparing yourself to, so don’t spend all of your time fretting over the fact that someone else is doing better than you because when you spend too much time doing that you won’t have enough time to embrace your own journey. And enmbracing your journey is what’s really important.

Making the move to stop comparing yourself to other people is a difficult thing to do positive thinker, but it is possible. So, when you find yourself comparing yourself to someone else take a step back from whoever’s life you’re looking at that’s causing you strife and start to focus on the things in your life that you are achieving instead of on the things that you aren’t achieving. And guess what positive thinker? When you find yourself being appreciative of the victories that you do have, you will end up drawing more victories your way. Being happy about your successes in life will put you in a better mood and when you’re in a good mood you feel like you can conquer the world, and when you feel like you can conquer the world positive thinker then that means that the world is yours for the taking.

Nevertheless, if you do find it more difficult to stop comparing yourself to people then perhaps it’s time to remove yourself from the situation(s) that lead you to compare yourself to others. For instance, if you need to, maybe take a step away from social media for awhile. Like I said earlier, our social media accounts are a constant reminder of people doing well in life. Nobody wants to share the bad stuff, so all we see is the good stuff in other people’s lives, and when we only see good things happening to other people then we may find ourselves wanting to compare our good things to those people’s good things and when they don’t measure up to each other we can end up feeling terrible about ourselves. So if social media is the source of your problem, take a break from it until you can find a way to stop comparing yourself so much to other people.

Positive thinker you may not believe it but you’re exactly where you need to be. When you stop comparing yourself to others and start relishing in your own successes, you’ll be able to see that for yourself. That person you’re comparing yourself to is awesome, but positive thinker, so are you! So, don’t allow the success of others to make you think that your own successes aren’t good enough. Be proud of your successes and your own unique journey!

Never forget, “Live your own life without comparing it with that of another.”

There seems to be a point in a lot of our lives when we simply give up on trying to do something with our lives that will make us feel truly alive. “Reality” catches up with you somewhere down the road. You realize that you need to make a living and that pursuing that thing that makes life worth living for you won’t bring you enough money to survive, so then you start to think that because you haven’t started to live the life that you want to live yet that you won’t ever be able to live that life, and then next thing you know, you give up on that life that you once dreamed of having. And because you have given up on trying to live the life that you want to live, you end up reaching a point where you feel like you need to settle for a life that isn’t really going to make you happy. Years go by and you find yourself stuck in this life that you’re living, and you may even start to figure that you’re never going to be able to live that life that you once thought that you could live.

You may have resigned yourself to live a life of complacency, but if you want more for your life than that then it’s not too late. If you constantly find yourself doing things that make you unhappy then it’s time to throw those things out of your life in a hurry. It doesn’t make sense to participate in activities that will weigh you down because when you do that you aren’t being true to yourself. And when you aren’t being true to yourself then you aren’t being your best self, and you deserve to be your best self positive thinker. Just because up until this point you’ve felt like you needed to engage in these spirit crushing activities doesn’t mean that you have to keep on doing it. Your path isn’t written in stone, so just because you’ve been doing things that haven’t been making you happy doesn’t mean that there isn’t time left in your life to start doing things that do make you happy.

In TV and in movies, and sometimes even in real life, people decide to start living the lives that they want to live after they receive some life altering news. Their doctor tells them that they only have a few months left to live, and so they drop everything that they were doing before that was making them unhappy and they start to pursue the things that they know are going to make them happy. A lot of TV shows and movies today don’t have the best lessons in them, but when these kinds of stories about people pursuing their dreams do come across our screens, a very clear message is presented to us— you shouldn’t have to wait until the end of your life to start living the life that you want to live. You deserve to be happy for all of your life, not just at the end of it, so don’t wait until the end of your life to start living with purpose. Go out and do things now that are in line with who you are as a person so that you can start to be happy now instead of waiting to be happy later.

And I know I’ve mentioned this before, but let me remind you again. You don’t have to just give up and leave your responsibilities behind you in order to live a life that allows you to do the things that bring you happiness. If you haven’t found a way to eliminate all of the things from your life that bring you down then you should at least make some time in your life to do the things that are going to bring you up. For instance, if you find yourself scrolling down your Facebook newsfeed for hours on end then try cutting back on that so that you can use your new found extra time to start doing things that are going to fill you up with new life. If you can spend time doing things that you don’t like to do then you should definitely find time to do the things that you do actually like to do because you’re only going to end up being a better and happier version of yourself because of it.

You shouldn’t give up on living a life that brings you happiness. We weren’t put here just to survive. We were put here so that we could live. Yes you have responsibilities now, but that doesn’t mean that you can’t start being who you wanted to be before life threw all of these new challenges your way, so go out there and find that thing or things that will give you life. Life’s to short to go around not living the life that you want to live, so if you find yourself living a half life, then go out there and find something that will make your life whole again!

Remember positive thinkers, “Strive to do things that define you. Say no to the things that don’t inspire you. Say yes to everything that fuels you. It’s the only life we live. Live it to your standards.”

Addiction is a difficult thing to deal with. Nobody starts off being addicted to whatever vice has control over their life. You don’t wake up one day addicted to drugs or alcohol; it takes time. One day you make the decision to try something new, even though you know that trying that thing may not be the best decision for your life, but you do go ahead with it anyway and you usually do so with the intention of only doing it once. You say to yourself, “Once I try this, I will never do it again,” but after that first time of trying it, you usually do end up doing it again. And then you do it again and again and more and more until next thing you know this thing that was once supposed to be a one time ordeal is now consuming every part of your waking life. It doesn’t let you escape from it, and whenever you think you can get a way from it it often ends up pulling you right back.

Sometimes we find ourselves aware of whatever we’re addicted to. It’s hard not realize that you’re struggling with an addiction like drugs or gambling, but other addictions aren’t so easy to identify. They have a hold on us and they consume us just like an addiction to alcohol would, but because we don’t think of it an addiction we may not seek to change our actions in order to get rid of it. Something like holding on to negativity can be a kind of addiction even if we don’t traditionally think of it in that way. If all you can do is talk about the negativity in your life then you just might be addicted to negativity. Talking about your problems 24/7 can be problematic because when all you do is talk about negative things all that you can expect is for more negative things to come your way, and having a life full of negativity is nothing that you should want to strive for. When all you do is talk about negative things, you should want to seek a change just like an addict to drugs seeks out a change when he or she finally wants to start living a life free from their addiction again.

Now don’t get me wrong, talking about the bad things that go on in your life can definitely be a healing experience. Holding in the bad is only going to leave you feeling worse about whatever bad things you may be going through, but when you choose to talk about it, you also choose to not let that bad thing have power over you. The cathartic release of those feelings can actually help you to move on from whatever may be plaguing you, so do make sure you talk about the difficulties in your life. It is important to do that, but it’s also important not to make the decision to only talk about the bad things in your life.

When you make a decision to talk about your joys positive thinker you also start to open yourself up to having more joys added into your life. You many not realize it, but when you talk about negative things, you make it possible for more negativity to enter into your life, and that’s not a good thing. If you want to bring more joy into your life then the best thing to do is to start acknowledging the joyous occasions that you do have.

Positive thinker, when you constantly find yourself doing something over and over again, that thing that you’re doing becomes an essential part of your life, which makes you want to not get rid of it, even if it’s bad for you. But if that thing that you find yourself going back to time after time after time again is bad for you then it is important that you try to break that habit of going back to it, so that you can be a healthier person. It’s not called an addiction because it’s something that can be easily broken, but it is possible for you to break the chain. If your vice happens to be that you focus too much on your problems, then you have to make a change if you want to stop focusing all of your energy on those problems. The first step is to make a conscious effort of tuning in to what you say. It may be too much to ask for you to stop talking about problems all together, especially when talking about them can help to make you feel better about your situation, but you do need to try and focus on what you say. If you hear yourself talking about one of your problems then make an effort to make sure and talk about something joyous that is happening in your life too.

Only talking about your problems isn’t going to help you to get rid of your problems positive thinker, but talking about your joys just may help you to experience more joy.

So remember, “Talking about our problems is our greatest addiction. Break the habit. Talk about your joys.”


Happy Saturday positive thinkers!

I hope all of you that have already signed up for The Mindfulness Summit are thoroughly enjoying the tools and resources that you have been given access to! And for those of you who haven’t signed up yet, don’t worry about it because there are still 14 more days for you to experience all that The Mindfulness Summit has to offer! This FREE event goes on until the end of October, and, with it, experts in mindfulness will teach you how to live your life with peace, purpose, and wisdom. So, if you’re interested in learning more about the important role that mindfulness can play in your life, then register for this eye-opening event with the link below! You don’t want to miss out on this summit!

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Positive thinker, have you ever experienced a time when you wanted to give up? I’m sure you have because it’s a perfectly natural response to want to give up on something when it becomes too difficult to complete. There seems to be something inside of us that causes us to want to give up on something after we start to think that that task is too hard to finish. For you, this feeling probably started during childhood. You might have had a subject that you struggled with in school or you might have taken up an activity that was too hard for you to participate in, and then because you didn’t excel at these things, you started to become frustrated, and then after the feeling of frustration started, you started feeling like you wanted to give up. But just because we felt like giving up doesn’t mean that giving up was an option that we always had. For some of us, there was some adult in our life (whether it was a parent, guardian, teacher or relative) that told us not to give up. We may have wanted to give up on trying to figure out that difficult math problem or on figuring out how to play the piano, but that person in our life saw the potential that we had and encouraged us to keep going even though things were tough. They were our cheerleaders and they were there telling us to keep going. We may have been down by a lot and it may have seemed like we would never win the game, but our cheerleaders were still there for us on the side lines yelling for us to keep going and to not give up.

Now that we’re adults, we don’t always have people in our corner telling us not to give up. We don’t have people there who are constantly reminding us of our potential. Yes, we still have friends and family who love us, but because we’re adults we have to learn to take responsibility for ourselves. You aren’t constantly there to remind your friends and family members of their potential 24/7, so they’re not expected to be your personal cheerleaders all the time anymore either. They were there when we were younger because we had not yet learned to cheerlead ourselves, but as we got older we were shown how to do just that and we were taught how important cheerleading for ourselves would be in our lives. So, now that we know how to do it, our friends and families don’t have to be the ones to cheer us on anymore. If we think something is difficult then we need to figure out a way to solve the problem; we can’t rely on someone else to tell us that we can’t give up whenever we hit a stumbling block. We have to find the strength to believe for ourselves that we are capable of completing the tasks that we set out to achieve.

And this is particularly important when it comes to sticking with a dream that you have. It’s one thing to give up on something that you don’t care about, but you should never give up on something as big as a dream. The more you care about something the more you should fight for it to happen. One setback is just that—a set back. Just because you didn’t achieve you dream the first time around doesn’t mean that you can’t ever achieve it. You just have to hit the drawing board again and figure out a new way to make your dream a reality. And getting back up after a failure can be difficult, but it’s something that you need to do if you ever want to make your dream happen. When you’re struggling with making a dream come true, it may seem like you’re losing the game, but there’s plenty of time left for you to go out there and win. Just because you fumbled the ball or missed the shot doesn’t mean the game is over. You just have to compose yourself, gather up the ball again and cheer yourself on to victory.

You may not have your friends or your parents constantly there next to you cheering you on, but you do have something better. Positive thinker, you have yourself! And no matter how hard you try, you can’t get rid of yourself, so you might as well be there to give yourself support. You remember how your parents never gave up on you? Well, now it’s time to be that person who never gives up on you. Go out there and be your own cheerleader positive thinker!

And remember, “Your dream doesn’t have an expiration date. Take a deep breath, and try again.”

There are two kinds of beauty in this world. The first kind of beauty, outer beauty, is the kind that we tend to be the most obsessed with. With all of these celebrities flooding our everyday lives, it becomes pretty easy to get into the habit of thinking that they are the epitome of beauty. With the Brad Pitts and Scarlett Johanssons of the world appearing before our eyes whenever we turn on the tv, watch a movie, drive past a billboard, or open up a magazine we start to slowly think that this is what beauty looks like. We’re conditioned to think that if we don’t look like these “beautiful people” then we aren’t beautiful. And when we start to think like this we may even go out of our ways to try and make ourselves more “beautiful.” So we try and dress how they dress and we put on buckets of makeup so we can look how they look and we do our hair the way that they do their hair all so that we can be “beautiful.” And when it’s all said and done and you take a look at yourself in the mirror, you may smile and think, “Now I am ‘beautiful,’” but just because you think you’re beautiful with all of these changes doesn’t mean that you weren’t beautiful before you changed the way that you looked. Yes, you may be more beautiful now based upon the standards of beauty that the media has presented to us, but in that quest to obtain that form of beauty you have lost what initially made you beautiful- the fact that you were being an authentic you.

We’re all made differently and that’s what makes us beautiful. Our society tries to tell us differently by bombarding us with images of “perfect” looking people, but the truth is that Hollywood beauty isn’t the only kind of physical beauty out there. Positive thinkers, there isn’t just one kind of beauty because there isn’t just one kind of person. Everyone is beautiful in their own way, even if they don’t look like the celebrities that traipse around Hollywood.

It is our uniqueness that helps us to be physically beautiful, but when we try to change how we look to fit some other mold we also take away the outer distinctiveness that made us beautiful in the first place. So instead of trying to change yourself, relish in the fact that you are the only person that looks like you positive thinker because that is what makes you beautiful on the outside. Every curve of your body, hair on your head, and even the scars on your face helps to make you a special kind of beautiful, so embrace it!

The second kind of beauty comes from within. This kind of beauty is the one that we should be more concerned about. Outer beauty will fade (even for celebrities), but inner beauty has the potential to last with you for your entire life. Inner beauty is the kind of beauty that makes the people who posses it want to do good deeds for others. It’s the kind of beauty that allows the people that have it to help cheer others up when that someone else is having a bad day. It’s the kind of beauty that makes that individual who has it want to go out in the world and make other people happy just for the sake of spreading joy to others. It’s a giving type of beauty, and the people have this kind of beauty have the potential to be bigger and better than that person who has the most physical beauty in the world.

Inner beauty is the kind of beauty that needs to be worked at. It’s not easy to choose the selfless route instead of the selfish route, but people who are full of inner beauty are able to do just that. If everybody in the world lacked inner beauty then the world would be a cold and nasty place, but fortunately for us, there are many people out there who have inner beauty and because of this they’re able to make this world a brighter place for the people that they come across. Strive for this kind of beauty positive thinker, because the world needs more brightness!

And always remember to “Be your own kind of beautiful.”

Have you ever felt like your world was crashing in around you? Like everything that was good in your life is all of a sudden not so good? And then you start to wonder if things could get any worse, and then they do. Yeah, that’s definitely happened to me before, and I’m sure it’s happened to you too, and that’s because life doesn’t always end up working out in the way that we want it to work out. Sometimes things happen that we have no control over, and sometimes these things make it seem like our life is heading in a direction that we don’t want it to head towards. When you lose a job that you worked your butt off to get, or when you get out of a relationship that you thought was going to last forever, or when you get hit with some pretty bad health news, you may think that your life as you know it is over. And to be perfectly honest with you, your life as you knew it is over, but just because your old life is over doesn’t mean that your new life has to be a bad one.

When bad things happen to us, we may be devastated in that moment and that’s a natural response. When things don’t go our way, we don’t feel like we should be happy. Instead, the opposite happens. We become unhappy. We can’t see past the darkness because the darkness is all around us, but that darkness doesn’t go on forever. There’s light somewhere, you just may not be able to see it yet.

You can think of unexpected pain like this…

Let’s say you’re driving on a road trip. Your music is blaring and you’re singing along off-key to your favorite tunes as your best friends also sing along in voices that are equally off-key. You’ve got one hand on the steering wheel of your big black Escalade and the other hand is hanging out of the side window as the wind whips your hair around freely and rhythmically. Everything’s going well as far as you can tell. There’s no traffic and you’re the only car on the road for miles, the roads are smooth, and the weather is perfect for taking a cross-country road trip. All of a sudden the music dies down and you hear the robotic voice of your Waze navigation app telling you to make an exit in one mile. Automatically you put on your signal, but since you haven’t seen any other car on the freeway for miles, you start to merge over one lane without checking your blind spot.

“Stop there’s a motorcycle there,” your friend yells at the top of her lungs as you make a sharp and dramatic movement to turn your wheel to left in order for you to avoid the motorcyclist.

You hear the motorcyclist honk his horn as your Escalade starts to spin out of control off to the left side of the freeway. Luckily for you, the freeway is still unoccupied by any other cars, so when you go over the side of the freeway and into the grassy land next to freeway you don’t hit any other cars. The airbags deploy when your car comes to a head first stop into a ditch, and as you pull your aching head back away from the steering wheel you look around you. Your friends are physically fine for the most part as far as you can tell. Everyone is shaken up, but that makes complete sense considering what has just happened. As you stiffly get out the car to assess the damages, you outwardly groan as you think about how much it’s going to cost to get your car fixed. The entire front of your car, including the tires, are torn to shreds and your car is so deep in the ditch that you wouldn’t be able to get it out without being towed. Reaching in your pocket, you pull out your phone and find the contact for AAA. When someone finally answers the phone, she lets you know that someone won’t be able to get to you for at least another hour. You sigh, thank the woman for her help, and get back into the car to tell your friends that you guys are stuck there for an hour. Nobody’s happy about it, but you all get back out of the car in silence and wait on the side of the road, away from your smoking car, for the tow truck to come and pick you up.

When you were driving, you didn’t see the driver in your blind spot because you were too focused on the road in front of you, but your friend saw it, and because she did, you and everybody else ended up safe and sound. In the moment after the accident you started to dread the fact that you’d be out of a few thousand dollars in order to fix your car, and you started thinking about the pain that had started to creep up on you, but that’s because you could only see the darkness in that moment. Later on down the road, once you’re out of that situation, those things would eventually start to not matter that much to you anymore. Yes your car was banged up, and yes you had to wait on the side of the road until a tow truck came to pick you up, and yes your trip was delayed, but you’re also alive and everyone in your car is alive too, and after awhile you’ll start to see that your friend’s warning ended up helping you out more than it hurt you.

Positive thinker, sometimes your life is heading in a certain direction, but you’re so focused on only seeing what’s right in front of you that you are unable to see something bad that is headed your way. Sometimes you need someone or something to change your course so that you don’t end up getting hurt more than you need to. Yes your life during those moments of pain might not be how you want your life to be, but your life could’ve ended up being a lot worse if you had continued down the road that you were going on. And don’t worry because that pain you feel in that moment of turmoil will go away once you see that the situation you’re going through is taking you to where you’re supposed to be.

If you don’t believe me, try thinking back to another point in your life when it seemed like all hope was lost. You probably felt like you were never going to come up out of that situation. You might have thought that you were going to be feeling down and out forever, but do you feel that way now? Is that situation still consuming you? Did you come out of that situation? Chances are that you did, and if you’re still going through something chances are that you aren’t going to go through it forever. All pain and suffering will come to an end. It may not come how or when you want it to, but an end to that pain will come one day.

So next time you find your life not going the way that you want it to positive thinker try thinking of that car crash scenario. This unanticipated mishap is just your friend in the backs seat helping you to avoid the unbearable pain that you would have gone through if you had stayed on your original path. This unexpected new course may just be God, Buddha, Allah, the Universe, or whatever entity you believe in telling you that your life right now isn’t as good as how it will be once it gets done with you.

Remember, “Sometimes our lives have to be completely shaken up, changed, and rearranged to relocate us to the place we’re meant to be.”

Good Vibes

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